So this is my first attempt at blogging in public. My friend Matt and his band strangercousin is playing at a coffee bar in Austin. Being here and watching him play made me very proud of him. He is and most likely always will be the best songwriter I know, and hearing him play and share his music is really a treat.
In the recent months, my own view of music and songwriting, both in my own life and in general, has gone through some pretty drastic changes. I started writing songs because I thought it could actually change things. Eventually, my good intentions became clouded by my insecure need for other people to think my music was cool, and thus by association, consider me cool. Had it not been for my amazing wife and her loving honesty, I think the hypocrisy music was becoming in me could have poisoned music and songwriting to me for good.
But I am so glad God is helping me to rediscover the original joy music had been in me. A well written song, whether it be through melody, chord structure, rhyme, or rhythm, can somehow speak on a level otherwise unreachable. It’s no mistake that music holds such an important place in the celebration and praise of God’s character. Whether it be the angels singing in 1000 octaves or the trumpets and clanging symbals of the Psalms, music is a gift from God to help us celebrate God in a super human way.
I connect to God best through music. I think my own selfishness kept me from experiencing that frequently, but in those moments of humble guitar playing and singing, I feel in His presence completely. I hope that music will become my way of communicating with God again, whether in public or in private.
As it seems, it is more difficult to blog in public than I thought. Keeping a straight thought is hard.